If it looks like I’ve started doing race reports on this blog, that’s because I have. I know I swore never to do this, because (and you know I’m right) the last thing the internet world needs is another professional athlete giving a blow by blow of their most recent race. This is almost acceptable for cross country MTB races because at least there’s some tension (“I passed so-and-so and then they passed me back and then I passed them again while they were trying to eat a gel packet because they accidentally dropped it out of their mouth and it got stuck in their front wheel HAHA SUCKAAA”), but for enduro it’s especially awful because what can you say beyond “I climbed up the hill, raced down it, and repeated this four times with no idea of how I was doing and then I sat around waiting for results and getting drunk on half of a 6% beer and it turns out I did okay.”

That said, here I am, breaking all my own principles and doing a race report. SHAME. The worst bit is that I think I might even make a habit of it. Here’s why: every race I do, I learn something new. About myself. About my bike. About all the things that can possibly go wrong (and right) in a race setting. And I want to chronicle these lessons in the hopes that maybe I will learn from my mistakes and grow from my successes. So yeah, it’s kind of a selfish thing, but I promise I will make it as painless as possible.

I had really high expectations for the first Enduro Cup in Moab. Not in the sense that I expected to get a certain place, but in the sense that I really, really, really wanted this race to reflect what I could do. My first race of the season, the EWS in Rotorua, was an exercise in frustration (and learning to deal with frustration, which by all means was an exercise I needed). I learned heaps, of course, but due to mechanicals and terrain that was frankly outside of my skill level, it didn’t feel like a very good barometer of my improvement and racing capabilities.

Moab gave me a little taste of the kind of racer I want to be — a consistent one. I know, dream big. But last year I was easily the most inconsistent racer in the women’s pro field (unless you count consistently terrible as consistent, which I do not). I had flashes of…I want to say brilliance but a more accurate term would probably be potential. Yes, I had flashes of potential, as in occasional stages where I did not crash, or have a mechanical, or mentally fall apart, or miss a turn, or just generally implode. These were rare, though. I spent most of last season one inch from mental disaster. And that sucked. I don’t want to do that, anymore.

This race was the first enduro I’ve done that felt like, well, a race, as opposed to “crisis management.” I had a few screw ups, but no crashes and no mechanicals. My places on the four stages were fifth, sixth, sixth and fourth. Turns out consistency is something I can achieve. I don’t think I rode my best or my smoothest, but at least I now know that it is possible for me to keep my shit together for one whole race, and do pretty well while I’m at it. So, that’s a relief.

I also realized that I want to be a well-rounded rider. This was a pretty pedally and not very technical course, and I really had no idea whether that would go in my favor or not. I don’t come from a cross country background, but I don’t come from downhill either. In the past this has frustrated me because sometimes it seems like I have no conceivable advantage, and it’s challenging to go into a race knowing that you’re up against people who have five, ten, twelve years of race experience that you don’t have. Macky pointed out, however, that my lack of a background might be a good thing because it means I don’t suck abysmally at either pedaling or descending. (I think he put it more nicely than that, but that’s the general idea.) I’m kind of in the middle. I think that was what happened in this race — I did get beat by the XC powerhouses, but I held my own against nearly everyone else. I’m hoping I can maintain this pattern on more technical courses as well, but we’ll see.

This race really motivated me to be well-rounded, and to work on the gaps in my skill set (ahem, mud, see Rotorua). While it’s satisfying to spend a ton of time doing one thing and becoming extremely good at it, that’s not how enduro works. And it comes down to personal preferences a bit too. I would rather do well at a bunch of different races, rather than win one race on terrain that perfectly suits me. I don’t want to be the person who complains about every race being two pedally or too gnarly. And I don’t want to freak out if it rains for the three days before a big event. I want to be able to do it all. Obviously, I have a way to go to achieve this, but at least I have a goal.

And this weekend was a positive step towards this goal. I ended up fifth in a pretty competitive field and got to stand on the podium with Katie Compton, Teal Stetson-Lee and Heather Irmiger, all women who I admire greatly for their insanely successful careers and their even more insanely humble attitudes. And in the case of Teal, both those things, plus her hair, which is the best.